Lightning strikes illuminating a decrepit, old manor house, vines climbing up the trellises and drainpipes, and an eerie organ playing from somewhere inside. Two lamps, which barely seem to cough forth a sickly, brown-yellow light, are stuck to either side of the porch by what seems like a hundred years’ worth of cobwebs. You walk closer, double checking the invitation, hoping that the address on the gate, half a mile back down the driveway, was wrong…but you know it wasn’t…
As you approach the first step, you hear a rust-encrusted handle clack loose, and a door with ancient hinges creaks in arthritic agony.
Another flash of lightning reveals a hunchback, one eye squinked almost shut, a grey beard with wild hairs jutting out at strange angles, teeth almost as yellow as the light oozing from the lamps, and a molding, old Greek sailor’s cap stuck to his larger-than-comfortable head… He limps from the door, smiling grotesquely, and waves a gnarled, crinkled hand while holding a candelabra with what’s left of the other…
“Ah… You’ve arrived… Excellent… The MASTER is particularly proud of his…COLLECTION…and he’s asked me to give you a tour. Unfortunately he’s flown…I mean, he’s driven into the village…to get a bite to eat, but I’m sure he’ll be back before morning… Come this way,” the hunchback says, and beckons you towards the dark, gaping door…
HEY FOLKS!!! Welcome to the guided tour of my GALLERY, also called
**THE HAUNTED HONEYCOMB!!!**
(Cuz, you know—HIVE… I think I’m funny…but I’m old, and senility makes LOTS of things funny!!! Ha!)
BELOW, in the dunge… I mean *basement* of that creepy old manor house, you will find an arcane collection of ecstatic expressions, created by the MASTER HIMSELF (a certified HOLY FOOL)—(“Master of WHAT?” I hear you asking…don’t think I can’t HEAR you just because you didn’t say it out loud!!!) These wondrous works are all AVAILABLE you for or some other EAGER COLLECTOR to acquire…for a PRICE… Muh ha ha ha haaaaaa! (And they’re ABSOLUTEDLY NOT HAUNTED! Well….maybe a little haunted…)
[Editor’s note: Prices and availability subject to change. And the MASTER is crazy, so at any moment, he might decide to add a ZERO to the end of all of his prices, and then you’ll wish you’d bought BEFORE he snapped and went all CAPITALIST-INCLINED!!! In addition, the MASTER’s BRIDE demands sacrifice!!! And the MASTER delivers for the MISTRESS!!!]
The HAUNTED HONEYCOMB Gallery is built in the quaint NFTShowroom Village, which was constructed over the ruins of the Hive-Engine Empire, which itself sprang from the ancient remains of the great HIVE-PRIME civilization that existed before either of the Great Floods (and a few Ice-Ages, as well…) If you are descended from HIVE-BLOOD (and you can still reckon your ACCOUNTS) then you should automatically find acceptance in NFTShowroom Village! If you have questions about any of this, feel free to ask. If NONE of this makes sense, try visiting HERE!!!
“Maybe the NEXT time you come by, I’ll take you on a tour of our LOST SOULS WING, where the MASTER holds a number of bound ENTITIES that he finds amusing… But not now. The sun is rising…and I hear wings… You should go! QUICKLY!!!!! AND DON’T LOOK BACK UNTIL YOU REACH THE ROAD!!!!”
—Richard F. Yates
(Primitive Thoughtician and Holy Fool)
SUPPORT INDEPENDENT FOLKS WHO ARE JUST MAKING STUFF BECAUSE THEY LOVE IT!!!